early bird's heart.

Okay so I woke up this morning to all three of my alarms going off at 4:55, 5:00, and 5:05 am. Haha
I have been having alot of trouble sleeping the past few months, so in order to fall asleep, I drink two cups of nighttime tea, and take 2 Melatonin tablets each night (it's a natural "sleep hormone" that your body makes, but apparently I'm deficient!) I am so paranoid I will not wake up out of my asleep coma in time to get ready for clinical!!  Anyways, yes I have clinical this morning, and normally I am supposed to be on my way to the hospital right now but I looked at my schedule and of  course, I don't have to be there until 8:30am today. SO i have a little down time.

Well let's see.


I have really been doing okay this past week. God is teaching me so much. Lots of things are screaming for my attention these days like school, work, church and a million others. And I would be lying if I said I wasn't feeling overwhelmed. But I have been learning to take life one day at a time. Seriously. I know that sounds so simple, but for someone like me who wants to have everything planned and wants to know her whole future today, that can be challenging to do. But when you reach a certain point where you are just in over your head and you know it, it is nothing but the strength and grace of God that gets you through. Anyone relating right now?
I just am so thankful to be learning this now while I am still young. Learning how to handle life. By no means will I ever understand it all. But I am coming to realize that life is an adventure, and God likes to surprise His children...so am I gonna' let Him do that? I have a rough idea of what I want my future to look like, and I have somewhat planned how I will get there...and that's good don't get me wrong, but at the same time I am reminded of the verse in Provers: In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. The Lord is leading me and guiding me. And I pray you know the same is true for you too, dear friend! The Lord is guiding YOU. The Lord will reveal His ways to you, in big or small increments. SO do not fear.

So there's that.

Also, I am wondering if any of you all have any input for me. I have been having a hard time with church for the past few months...just lots of drama and heartache there, yet just up and leaving is proving to be extremely difficult, simply because I have gone there my entire life. So anyways, I have not been going for awhile now. I have visited a few other churches, but again am just having a really difficult time connecting with people, which I know is what I need. Really other than my mom, I do not have anyone investing into me spiritually or encouraging me right now, and it is definitely beginning to take it's tole. But while I am in the process of looking around for a new church family, do any of y'all have any recommendations on online sermons, or things like that that I can be listening to or reading? I have heard of a few, but was just wondering if any of you knew of any others. Please feel free to comment or email me! I would greatly appreciate it!! Thank you thank you :)

Well, I better scoot now...time to do Wednesday!! May the grace of our God go with each of you as you embark on another new day. Celebrate His faithfulness! For He is good.